Friday, August 25, 2006

World Peace

I work with a Christian economic development organization. My Dad, as a side business, is starting an online directory of services and products that might be called New Age. It's really much more than that... it's hard to put a name on the whole thing, but you can see it here.

It's hard to say where I'm at spiritually. I'm a Christian but... not in the typical sense, maybe. I can't even describe or understand myself and my relationship to God. I mean hopefully soon I will be able to, but I'm not really at that point yet... I'm growing.

Anyway, last night my Dad and I went to Red Lobster late for drinks and appetizers (yum). We spent the whole evening talking about my Dad's favorite... what do I call him... teacher, speaker, peace-loving man... his name is Eckhart Tolle and his passion is the power of NOW. Honestly, I have listened to some of his CDs, and what he has to say is very good and non-threatening. A person from any religion could listen and benefit in huge ways because he's talking about presence, awareness, consciousness, being, LIFE! He's not talking about anything that conflicts with our religious beliefs. In fact, Jesus understood this stuff about presence very well. Consider the lillies...

My Dad kept trying to convince me to listen to it. I told him I want to, the only thing keeping me from listening is not fear - it's lack of time. I'm bad at time management anyway (I like to just have fun)... add to that the fact that I work for myself and it's just hard to take time for quietness. Of course that's the world's worst excuse and I know that.... all I have is now. That's all I have. (Do I even believe that? It's true!)

The original purpose of this post was to say that this woman here in Fargo has a little operation going and it's all focused on peace - everything from inner peace to global peace. She left a voicemail on my parents' answering machine looking for me. Her message was a little funny cause she was like, "I heard all about wonderful Jen and her work on this planet, and I'd like to talk to her." Uhh okay. (She literally said 'on this planet' about 5 times.)

I finally called her back today, not sure if she was interested in hearing about my writing/communications work, our church life attempts, or what! Turned out she was interested in the economic development work I'm doing with the non-profit. I told her all about it and she was very interested. She asked if I would come and speak to a small group to share more and give them opportunities to get involved, possibly.

That's when I had to bring in the C-word: it's a Christian organization. Everything we do is unabashedly Christian. We bring clean water to the poorest communities in Africa, yes... it's very tangible... but we never leave it at that. Clean water is our way of telling the story of Jesus as the Living Water that quenches all thirst. If I am totally candid, I will tell you that even that makes me slightly uncomfortable sometimes. It's like providing basic resources to dying children is stipulated on them letting us talk about God as we know him. (Don't I sound so modern? So sickeningly contemporary and skeptical? Hah.) But if who we know God to be, in Jesus Christ, is true, then what's the problem? Why the uneasiness in me? Maybe it's because I know how this will be carried out. I know the people will do it with a missions-minded frenzy. Ugh. There's so much I can't even really say on here because I'd hate to say key words that are google-able.

Well finally I told this woman that it is a Christian organization and every project we do is marked by that. She was disappointed, I could tell... but she kept finding ways for us to get over that divide and still have me speak to her group. I just thought it would have made them tremendously uncomfortable, and maybe me, too. There would have been no way for them to engage with our organization in particular, because they never would have agreed with the way we do it. Clean water and church planting? They would have none of that.

So... sigh. I was glad I didn't get roped into that, but kind of bummed that there is a division between me and this woman. We both have photos of girls from around the world in our homes. We both have a heart that leaps when we think about children in poverty, and creating opportunity, and common life, that sort of thing. But the way we go about it is so different... maybe that's fine. It just is a divide that I wish wasn't there.

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